No Tears For My Love

She held my hands with her trembling little ones, and brought them to her lips, painfully warm tears trickled down her eyes on to my hands. I had to be strong, I knew. She was weak, she was in pain, each second left needed to be filled with smiles not tears, but was I strong enough to see her go away? I couldn’t fight back the memories of the first time I met her coming back into my head.
It was a hot summer June evening, We, me and my friends were at the beach. The wind and waves were playing a grand symphony. We, sweating after the rigorous game of sand rugby were making our way to get some pav bhaji. The wind seemed to change its note, a little lower, much deeper note. This felt good, a strange energy was seeping through me, ignoring this, I ordered my pav bhaji and waited for it. Out of the blue, someone crashed in on me, taking me to the ground. I was enraged, it seemed to be a girl lying on top of me, I pushed her away and got up. I heard some apologies being muttered, and without even looking at her offered her my hand to get up, and she grabbed hold of it …the first time I touched those soft hands… I was checking my shirt, and unforgivable stains marked it. I raised my head, in a fit of anger to bark at whoever was the reason for this fiasco (my mom warns me that I will wash my own cloths if I stain them) and my eyes met with those beautiful eyes. Anger was a forgotten emotion, all that I could mutter then was…. “S….S….Sorry” I guess I had my mouth opened, she giggled. A friend of mine stepped in and told me, ‘Arjun, this is Rhea, she is my neighbor’ and turning towards her asked, ‘What are you doing here, spilling things all over my friends?’ She replied in that sweet musical voice of hers, none of her words reached me , it was all a strange music, I knew her name, I knew where she lived, I had a common friend, and all that I knew was that she will be the one, the one poets describe in all those big big words, the one whose every breath is much more important to me than mine, I knew it then she was her. But I dint know the truth …
Her eyes were half open, half closed, as if in a real dream. She wouldn’t let go of me, even after being told so by the doctors. She clung on to me like a kid hangs on to her teddy, embracing its warmth. I was fighting hard not to let tears slip through my eyes. An hour more they said, and I thought it would have been a lifetime…
I confided in my friend Abhi (Rhea’s Neighbour cum friend) that I liked that gal, and would like to try and hook up with her. He warned me she was not the regular take out on a couple of dates, give some gifts , fall in love girl. I informed him, that he had no reasons to worry, I am not gonna misbehave. After a week, which seemed like an year, Abhi threw a party and invited both of us to it. I was on my best attire that day, she spotted me almost instantly, I said a meek little hi and she responded. The angel clad in blue walked upto me. She was looking amazing, I said exactly that to her, ‘ You look amazing Rhea’ She blushed pink, I asked her, ’Would you like to move to the balcony ? It’s a little airy there’ She nodded in approval. The wind was again playing that music. We were alone there, just the two of us, two strangers. I was staring at her and she at me, no words spoken for five minutes, then I muttered , ‘ You know in such situations when I am alone with a girl, I start flirting, but with you, flirting seems to be too cheap.’ She smiled, blushing a little and innocently asked, ‘Why so?’ I felt she was giving me a positive response, I went ahead , ‘Don’t know, maybe you are just too special’ She smiled again, a hint of mischief in it and asked ‘Now, tell me if this is not flirting’ I walked a little closer to her, looked into her eyes and said, ‘Rhea, I don’t know who you are, I don’t know why we are here alone in this place, but I think I know one thing, our lives were supposed to intersect, and I hope god has plans for us.’ She laughed again.
She was whining again, like a baby, the pain was too much for her, It killed me from within to see her in such pain, why couldn’t it end and be over with it, why she had to suffer this fucking pain, why did it have to be her, there are billions and millions of people, yet why it had to be her who were to be hit by that wretched truck.
Years passed by, Rhea and I were together now. With each passing day, our obsession for each other just grew. All our friends would say, you guys need to get a life, always just obsessed with each other. We were each other’s best friends, she knew me much better than I knew me and I her. On August 11th last year I went down on my knees, popped a ring and asked her ‘Will you marry me?’ For that look on her face I would have given a leg and an arm, her eyes had brimmed with tears when she nodded her answer. We had made love that day, for the first time to make our day memorable.
The pulse was falling, she was holding me stronger than ever, her nails dug deep into me, her breath was faltering, it was becoming heavy, really heavy, her eyes were bloodshot and were pleading for help… But, I couldn’t… I couldn’t keep my promise of being with her throughout… even in death…
I was taking her to the card maker, to print our wedding cards, on the way she wanted to have an ice cream, I parked the car and went towards the ice cream guy. There were quite a lot of people waiting to get an ice cream. She stepped out of her and crossed the road to come to me, and then it ran into her, throwing her away like a doll. I saw her falling on the ground withered, helpless… I ran towards her, she was soaked in blood, the red strangely made her more beautiful. I took her up, held her in my arms. Life was hanging on to her by a thread, I ran , ran like never before, I tried not to look at her like that, but she was going away from me forever.
The nails pierced my skin, she gulped in air and then the grip was lost, her hand fell limp on the bed. She looked beautiful.
She was there, I could see her. In that blue dress , she was coming towards me, but there was something strange about her, there was a light coming from her, she came sat next to me, I put my head on her lap. I felt no need to cry, she was there with me, it was someone else who had died. She was there with me, by my side, always….